If you are a Ted Lasso fan like I am – you will be eagerly awaiting the third and final instalment of great leadership learns from Ted as reflected by Doug Schumann.
If you missed the first 2 instalments – you can check them out here.
How To Lasso Yourself Some Leadership Skills – Part 1
How To Lasso Yourself Some Leadership Skills – Part 2
This reflection focuses on Episodes 7-10 of Ted Lasso Season 1 so also be sure to watch those episodes before diving in...
As a refresher, the main lessons discussed in Parts 1 and 2 have included:
· Be yourself
· Catch people doing things well
· Be kind
· Be open to new ideas
· In coaching, one size does not fit all
· Focus on lessons for life, not for just sports
· Ask rather than tell
· Be vulnerable
· See different perspectives
· Create a common language and culture
· Pay close attention (with a no schadenfreude rule)
· Practice makes perfect
The lessons learned in the first six episodes continue to resonate throughout the show. So what more can we learn from Ted….
Be curious not judgmental
Like many of us, Ted has been underestimated at varying times in his life. He learned a great life lesson early on that many still struggle with. He realised that bullies have a tendency to only think about themselves and rarely care about their impact on, or the needs of others. When Rupert challenges Ted to a game of darts, Rupert is overconfident in his own ability and doesn’t ask whether Ted has played before. Rupert simply assumes he is a better player than him. Ted is curious about everything in life and took the time to watch Rupert play. Being curious, not judgmental is a great mindset to have for every leader. Ask a lot of questions, observe everything, and try to understand who people are without making any quick judgements regarding what you think they know, or are able to do. Success is much more likely when you are curious and ask questions before rushing to judgment.
Surround yourself with people who will tell you the truth
You may notice that some people, as they become more successful close the circle of people they interact with. This can be detrimental if they become too insulated from the rest of the world, and those that remain around them are what some refer to as “yes men”. “Yes men” are people who will only tell someone what they think they want to hear. When this occurs, people become enclosed in an echo chamber of sorts where they are only hearing one opinion over and over again and that one opinion gets amplified to the point that they believe everyone believes the same thing.
Ted likes to surround himself with people who are very different from himself, and people who have different views than his. I believe part of the reason he does this is to ensure that multiple perspectives are seen and heard, and people are empowered to tell the truth. Ted allows Nate to share his thoughts on the team’s performance with the entire team. While his commentary may have been harsh at times, it was true. In addition, Nate’s comments were things the team needed to hear. Sharing his thoughts with the team lit a spark in them and they went on to rally.
Allow for brutal honesty
Surrounding yourself with the right people is not enough. It is also important to develop a culture where people can be brutally honest (when the situation calls for it). In some teams and organisations, people are so worried about getting along that they are uncomfortable bringing up things that need to be heard, in a way that will resonate. Keeping the peace is more important in these cultures than having conversations that need to be had.
Later in the season, Nate and Coach Beard were trying to get Ted to accept that Roy wasn’t playing as well as they needed him to. Although it took some time for Ted to accept the fact that Roy had “lost a step” and his performance as a starter was becoming detrimental, Ted finally did. This was due in part to Coach Beard and Nate being empowered in a way that they were able to continue to tell Ted their opinion even though he didn’t agree with it. In many organisations there are senior leaders who create a culture where they don’t want to hear anything they don’t agree with. People are fearful of telling their boss the truth and because of this, those organisations will never truly get as far as they could.
To further follow the lesson, after Ted realised that Roy had to move out of the starting line up, Ted had to be brutally honest with Roy about it. Note that Ted handled these discussions with grace and kindness while also noting that it was a conversation that needed to be had.
Surround yourself with people that are different than yourself
The best teams are made up of people that are very different. Ted realises this, and his inner circle is reflective of this belief. While Ted and Coach Beard have a shared philosophy on coaching, their interests outside of work are very different. Nate, Higgins, Keeley and Rebecca all bring different experiences and perspectives to the team. I have seen numerous organisations where leaders only hire people exactly like themselves. If this is the case, even if you create a culture where people can tell you the truth and be brutally honest, the fact is, similar people will see things the same way. That being the case, people who see the world like you may agree with the approach you have taken or the decisions you have made so they may all have the same blindspot.
It’s not just allowing for differences in perspective that can enhance the overall performance of a team, taking steps to ensure your teams are diverse and inclusive of different races, ethnicities, ages and gender will significantly improve your results. Numerous studies have verified this. In one example, McKinsey found that public companies that were in the top quartile for ethnic and racial diversity in management were 35% more likely to have financial returns above their industry means, and those in the top quartile for gender diversity were 15% more likely to have returns above the industry mean. Having a team that is different makes good business sense!
Forgive
One of the most powerful things any person can do is forgive. As the season progresses Rebecca realises just how horribly she has treated Ted. I am sure it was even more painful a realisation for her considering how nice a person Ted is. Rebecca becomes worried that Ted will never forgive her and procrastinates on apologising to him. When she finally does apologise, Ted could have been very upset with her for what she did. I believe Ted’s reaction was much more impactful. He simply forgave her. Ted realises that everyone makes mistakes, and that life can be difficult. If someone is truly sorry for what they have done, the best thing you can do is forgive them and hope they have learned from the experience. I believe Ted takes to heart Mark Twain’s quote - “Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.”
As a reminder, once you have forgiven someone, the best thing to do is to fully let it go. The only time to come back to it would be if the person does the same thing again. Otherwise, it should be left in the past. If you are able to do that, you will become very well respected as a leader because your team won’t feel encumbered by their past and beholden to their mistakes, or worried about ever making another one.
Believe
Early in the series Ted puts a simple word on the wall, “believe”. He comes back to this word throughout the series. Ted knows that belief leads to so much more. Belief in yourself, belief in your teammates, belief in your coaches. In alignment with the concept of kaizen, little changes eventually become big changes as momentum builds, and the more you believe in yourself and your teammates, the better your performance will be.
Ted uses the word “believe” to counter a local saying that had been attributed to the team. The saying is, “it’s the hope that will kill you”. The team has been struggling for quite some time and failure can become a way of life for some teams, and some people. The research on optimism and pessimism can help explain this. Studies show that optimists lead longer lives, are happier and more successful than pessimists. Having an optimistic worldview leads to better results.
Part of this is because of the fact that what you focus on expands. If you focus on bad things, that is what you will see, and these will begin to compound. Ted replaces the old saying with “believe” and the results over the course of the season are quite telling.
The team truly starts to believe in themselves. They begin to experience the little wins, and these begin to build into more wins. The team realizes that the work they are doing is paying off, despite the bumps and hurdles they have experienced. By the end of the season, every player has more faith in their abilities as well as more faith in their teammates and coaches.
Belief has become part of the team culture by the end of the season. Even though the team lost their final match and were relegated, they still believe, perhaps even more so, and will go into next season more determined.
So, are you ready and as excited as I am to see what new lessons the team learns during Season 2?
Want to develop your leadership skills? Send me an email at michelle@bakjacconsulting.com to enquire about coaching and training to develop strategies.
Michelle Bakjac is an experienced Psychologist, Organisational Consultant, Coach, Speaker and Facilitator. As Director of Bakjac Consulting, she is a credentialed Coach with the International Coach Federation (ICF) and a member of Mental Toughness Partners and an MTQ48 accredited Mental Toughness practitioner. Michelle assists individuals and organisations to develop their Mental Toughness to improve performance, leadership, behaviour and wellbeing. You can find her at www.bakjacconsulting.com or michelle@bakjacconsulting.com
