The term cognitive dissonance is used to describe the feelings of discomfort that result when your beliefs run counter to your behaviours and/or new information that is presented to you. People tend to seek consistency in their attitudes and perceptions, so when what you hold true is challenged or what you do doesn't jibe with what you think, something must change in order to eliminate or reduce the dissonance (lack of agreement). A classic example of this is "explaining something away."
Check out this article from Healthline to explain further.
Cognitive dissonance describes the discomfort experienced when two cognitions are incompatible with each other.
A cognition is a piece of knowledge, such as a:
thought
attitude
personal value
behaviour
This incompatibility (dissonance) could happen when you do something that goes against a value that’s important to you. Or maybe you learn a new piece of information that disagrees with a long-standing belief or opinion.
As humans, we generally prefer for our world to make sense, so cognitive dissonance can be distressing. That’s why we often respond to cognitive dissonance by doing mental gymnastics to feel like things make sense again.
Here’s a look at some common examples of cognitive dissonance and how you might come to terms with them.
1. Picking up after your dog
Let’s say you have a dog that you take for daily walks around your neighbourhood. Like any responsible dog owner, you carry plastic bags and always clean up after your dog.
One day, you realise you forgot the bags while halfway through the walk. And your dog chooses that moment to do his business.
You take a quick look along the street. No one’s around, so you call your dog and hustle away. Once home, you begin to feel guilty. You know it’s not right to leave your dog’s mess. What if someone steps in it or it ruins your neighbour’s lovely garden?
“But it’s just the one time,” you tell yourself. You ran out of bags. You’ll replace them and always pick up after your dog in the future.
Besides, it’s not like you’re the only one who does it. You’ve seen other dog’s messes in the neighbourhood. If other people don’t pick up after their dogs, why should you have to?
2. Getting enough exercise
Chances are, you value your health. You make a conscious effort to choose nutritious foods, try to avoid processed foods and soft drinks, and shoot for eight hours of sleep every night.
But you spend most of your day sitting at your desk. You tell yourself it’s OK since you’re taking care of your health in other ways. You still feel guilty, though, because you know it’s important to be active.
You even joined a gym a while back, but you never go. Every time you see the membership tag on your keychain, it reminds you of that pesky truth — that exercise is part of a healthy lifestyle.
Finally, you decide to go to the gym. You start going to bed earlier and get up with enough time to work out. It’s hard at first, but instead of feeling guilty when you see the gym keychain, you feel proud of yourself.
3. Moving for love
You and your partner live in a large city. You love city life and can’t imagine living anywhere else. One day, your partner comes home from work with some news. They’ve received a promotion — in a small town four hours away. You’ll have to move.
You feel unhappy. You don’t want to move, but your partner is excited about the promotion, and you want them to be happy. Little by little, you begin to consider the pros of living in a small town. You even read some articles on small-town living.
Small towns are safer, you think. There won’t be city traffic. The cost of living will be lower. You might even be able to get around town without having a car. Finally, you remind yourself that four hours isn’t so far, after all. You’ll be able to visit your friends and family often.
4. Being productive at work
At work, you have a fairly private cubicle. Your computer use isn’t monitored, and you often find yourself browsing the internet or even catching up on TV shows instead of working.
Sure, you eventually get your work done, but you know you could be doing more. You might feel guilty, knowing you’d be in trouble if anyone found out. But whenever you get bored, you find yourself online again.
You read an article about workplace productivity that says people are more productive when they work in short bursts and take frequent breaks. “I’m just increasing my productivity,” you tell yourself.
After all, you rarely take time off. And when you do work, you work hard. You should get to relax, too.
5. Eating meat
You consider yourself an animal lover. You’ve always had pets and, whenever possible, purchase products that aren’t tested on animals.
But you also enjoy eating meat, though you know some animals are kept in inhumane conditions before being butchered. You feel guilty but can’t afford to buy meat from pasture-raised or grass-fed animals. And a meat-free diet isn’t realistic for you.
In the end, you decide to start buying cage-free eggs and plan to replace one of your meat purchases each shopping trip with humanely raised meat or a meat substitute, like tofu or tempeh. This reduces your guilt and helps you bridge the gap between your love of animals and your diet.
Tips for resolving cognitive dissonance
Cognitive dissonance isn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it can prompt you to make positive changes when you realize your beliefs and actions are at odds.
It can be problematic if it leads you to justify or rationalize behaviours that could be harmful. Or maybe you get caught up in trying to rationalise the dissonance to the point of stressing yourself out.
The next time you find yourself in a moment of cognitive dissonance, take a moment to ask yourself a few questions:
What are the two cognitions that aren’t fitting together?
What actions would I need to take to eliminate that dissonance?
Do I need to change any specific behaviours? Or do I need to change a mindset or belief?
How important is it for me to resolve the dissonance?
Simply being more aware of how your thoughts and actions fit together can help you develop greater understanding of what’s important to you, even if you don’t completely eliminate the dissonance.
The bottom line
Everyone experiences cognitive dissonance in some form in their life. It’s more common to feel discomfort, and we can proactively resolve the dissonance, when cognitions are important to you, or they conflict heavily with each other.
Resolving cognitive dissonance can often lead to positive changes. It doesn’t always involve making sweeping changes. Sometimes, it’s just a matter of changing your perspective on something or developing new patterns of thinking.
Want to manage your personal cognitive dissonance about an issue worrying you? Send me an email at michelle@bakjacconsulting.com to enquire about personal coaching.
Michelle Bakjac is an experienced Psychologist, Organisational Consultant, Coach, Speaker and Facilitator. As Director of Bakjac Consulting, she is a credentialed Coach with the International Coach Federation (ICF) and a member of Mental Toughness Partners and an MTQ48 accredited Mental Toughness practitioner. Michelle assists individuals and organisations to develop their Mental Toughness to improve performance, leadership, behaviour and wellbeing. You can find her at www.bakjacconsulting.com or michelle@bakjacconsulting.com
